“I Love Indonesia, But…”: Contemplation of a Red and White’s Spirit

Name: Englandiva Akyla Maulita Hartono

IG Handle: @englandiva

Jemari ini mulanya mengepal, semangat mudaku berkobar siap menaklukan "Although you had been all around the world, it doesn't mean that you have no obligation to be loyal to your own country"

When I was a kid, my parents firmly influenced me in order to strengthen my nationalist soul. They told me that I had to contribute everything for the sake of Indonesia whether joining an international event or within the national sphere. I was grateful because my dad was a diplomat, which led me to follow every single event, shouting “Indonesia!” enthusiastically, and also had the opportunity to enlighten the stage.

Born and living in Indonesia invigorated me to burn my soul around the world. However, as the time goes by, I realize something in my own country needs a transformation. Not just a transformation, but also a movement to proceed with it. Observing the disruption in political, economic, societal, cultural, environmental and numerous spheres has made me despondent about the bright future I hope for Indonesia.

I do love my own country, and for many decades, I will shed abundant efforts for Indonesia. Nonetheless, how devastating are you to force yourself to love your own country but my red and white spirit shrinks because of the 'people' themselves?–the 'people' who deliberately switch my perspective from how Indonesia could have been to a dash of disenchantment.

Perhaps, the so-called Indonesia Emas 2045 is drawing nearer, calling the next generation to adhere alongside Indonesia. But, if the 'people' desire to glorify the noise for Indonesia, allow me to pour my turmoil of emotions out because how can my love for Indonesia be ever-lasting if it does not align with my red and white spirit as well as when I was a kid?